I will leave the light on

Light on

I will leave the light on.⁣

A good friend of mine is walking through darkness right now. The thing about seeing our friends and family suffer is that we immediately feel like we should offer help, or advice. Like we should reach out to them and try to make it ‘easier’, there is a desire to want to lighten their load. And yet it is not ours to carry. Instead I think the biggest gift we can offer in these times of darkness is of light. Of support. Even if they need to stay out in the darkness of the woods a while, I think the light offers comfort and safety simply by shining. ⁣

This friend of mine is a lighthouse for so many women, and so to her I offer her my own tiny light. I think it is enough. We offer the light we have, and leave it on... ⁣

Sidenote 1. This doodle was inspired from the insanely talented @ruththorpstudiowho’s work I discovered in Bath last year. Her art moves me deeply, and I thoroughly recommend you check her out. 🖤🙏🖤⁣

Sidenote 2. J made me a mixtape on Spotify recently, yes, like back in the old days 😉 On it is a song called ‘Leave a Light On’ by Tom Walker... oh. my. word... let me know what you think if you check it out... 🖤🖤🖤⁣

Sidenote 3. I can’t get the idea of us all on here now being like watchers on the wall (Games of Thrones reference 😉). Are you with me!? ⁣

Shine your light ✨⁣

Help

help

I find asking for help really hard.⁣

Help, definition: to give someone support or information so that they can do something more easily.⁣

Resilience is one of those words that gets bandied about in the world of education a whole lot... like it's the holy grail. Raise resilient kids. Yet, here's the thing, I consider myself to be incredibly resilient and I'll knock any real-life curve ball you throw my way out the park. But ask me to be vulnerable, and admit my struggles and I'll feel my chest go into lock down and will disappear back down inside my rabbit hole. Accepting that I need help and that help involves other humans who know or can do more than me I find really hard. ⁣It always seemed to me a little like admitting defeat, like wanting something to be easier will make the outcome less rewarding. Like I am less than I should be.

Yet recently I've started to realise that I can't handle the messiness of my mind all alone. I don't understand it, and I can't seem to minimise my thoughts the way I can my worldly needs. For this work, I need help. I'm a type 5 on the Enneagram and I'm realising that this is a thing for us... information and knowledge is my clutter. It is my strength, and my weakness. So far I've not managed to find the #marikondomagic for my mind just yet, although @a_life_in_progress is definitely helping 😉

So I've decided that not only do I want to raise resilient kids, I want my kids to be confident in their not-knowing. Staying curious and open and vulnerable... and resilient... that's what I want to be, and to raise. ⁣

Asking for help, I think, is actually one of the most courageous things we can do for ourselves. We have to appraise our situation, admit our struggles, and reach out beyond our comfort zone into the wild but wise unknown.

What about you, do you have a healthy relationship with help?